The crazy girls being better at sex thing always confused me. I vaguely understand that correlation but like… it holds so true. What is it about bpd that makes you bang so good?
The good times are especially good and the bad times are especially bad, currently dating one and confused a lot of the time
Sometimes she’s a “pick any hole” kind of girl with fictional tier blowjobs every morning but the flipside is I’m sometimes the worst person in the world because I said something triggering I don’t learn about until days later that isn’t even triggering to a normal person
I’m really sensitive like an empath so I’ve been losing sleep over whether to run or if her gushing love for me part time is worth the struggle, and also it’s stressful thinking I already locked in and she might do something bad to herself if I leave now
Girl is insanely attractive like beyond my league too for context, I’m 31 and she is 26, with cutting scars all over her body which don’t actually scare me but it means it probably will keep happening and there’s nothing I can do about it
So far she’s self aware and warns me when she’s about to get sick again and I think the maturity and honesty is why I haven’t ran yet. But even with warning, and her turning on me soon after, is still incredibly confusing for me
Yes, you should run. It probably doesn’t do you any good to tell you this now, as I know how intoxicating those times can be, but you should run. I was in exactly this situation. Also it WILL be hard to find equivalent sex in the future. Just try not to think too much about the fact that you might have now peaked in that regard.
If you get to the point that you want some helpful answers, consider reading Attached by Amir Levine and Rachel Heller. I read it in one night, it was so helpful back in the day. See if maybe it touches any sensitive areas.
One explanation for someone who is bipolar. Hypomania can express as hypersexual.
My wife and past girlfriends have experienced this with me and to be honest it’s fun for the first hour but having a throbbing boner and inability to satisfy the urge stops being fun for both parties involved. Also makes woman feel horribly inadequate that they can’t get a man to cum. Add to it I try to do all sorts of uncomfortable things to us both to just find some release.
I’m sure that the bipolar woman go through what I have gone through it’s like eating nonstop and still being hungry even though your stomach is about to burst. You feel like a disgusting slob with every bite but can’t put the food down. All you crave is the sloppiest and nastiest food because anything healthy just doesn’t get you there. The regret afterwards sometimes is next level.
The mania also helps. Bipolar isn’t just a happy-sad thing. The manic phase is categorized in the same group as schizoaffective disorders. Some of the most common symptoms of mania are hyper sexuality and feeling invincible. Imagine being absolutely insatiable even while doing it. So you keep going harder and harder, trying to find something to sate the urge. And the entire time, you’re delusional to the point of thinking nothing will hurt you. If you’re a manic girl who just brought home a random hookup, he’s about to get sex so hard his entire genetic line will be impressed.
As a gay man, I had some of the best sex with a man that turned out to be a little cray cray. His place was immaculate but he freaked out on me after one hookup. Granted, I did cancel our second date, but no need to get weird about it. Blocked. Never driving around his place again either.
She was not honest and was not working on it. I was just hopeful it would magically get better. Because I’m stupid and figured it had to if I just kept working on it and being a good boyfriend. But I know now there wasn’t much I could do.
You’ll be so exhausted from her meltdowns, manipulation, and the constant repairs (literal and figurative) from her poor life choices that you won’t have the time or energy for sex. Then she’ll cheat on you with your gross scumbag neighbor who was old enough to be her father because she jumped to the conclusion that you did’t want her anymore and she wanted revenge.
She’ll then proceed to run off with one your friends. But not before explaining how it’s probably just temporary and the relationship will be stronger than ever when she comes back. So stay single. Oh, can you keep her cat for now? He doesn’t have room in his parent’s apartment that she’s moving into the day after fucking him for the first time.
My early 20s were trash. She ended up completing suicide a week before my wedding in 2012. Myself, I was so fucked up by that relationship I now live with chronic anhedonia and alexithymia. It literally broke my brain.
You still seem deeply traumatized. The way you speak about your experience is something that reminds me of myself and other people’s communication with unprocessed traumatic experiences.
You experience is valid, but the way you generalize and demonize BPD/mentally ill women is not. You can’t expect to get any pity or validation by randomly trauma dumping in a shitposting community. Getting angry and generalizing is often the first step towards healing, but… This is not the place to do it.
You’re accusing me of generalizing/demonizing women with BPD in a thread questioning if sex with mentally ill people is “worth it”. Get off your high horse and spare me your armchair psychoanalysis.
No I just don’t want to tell you straight up to just shut the fuck up. And I’m not accusing you, you obviously fucking did. You phrased it as if your experience is representative of all experiences, without any nuance, empathy, and expressed a deep grudge you still seem to hold. Nobody needs armchair psychoanalysis to tell you that that’s obviously something you still need to work on and not something to share as a reply to someone asking why BPD people bang better.
There’s plenty of ways to tell people “a relationship with a mentally ill person is a commitment and might backfire; be careful” - “she will fuck your neighbor and I almost killed myself” is arguably one of the shittier ones.
The crazy girls being better at sex thing always confused me. I vaguely understand that correlation but like… it holds so true. What is it about bpd that makes you bang so good?
The good times are especially good and the bad times are especially bad, currently dating one and confused a lot of the time
Sometimes she’s a “pick any hole” kind of girl with fictional tier blowjobs every morning but the flipside is I’m sometimes the worst person in the world because I said something triggering I don’t learn about until days later that isn’t even triggering to a normal person
I’m really sensitive like an empath so I’ve been losing sleep over whether to run or if her gushing love for me part time is worth the struggle, and also it’s stressful thinking I already locked in and she might do something bad to herself if I leave now
Girl is insanely attractive like beyond my league too for context, I’m 31 and she is 26, with cutting scars all over her body which don’t actually scare me but it means it probably will keep happening and there’s nothing I can do about it
So far she’s self aware and warns me when she’s about to get sick again and I think the maturity and honesty is why I haven’t ran yet. But even with warning, and her turning on me soon after, is still incredibly confusing for me
Also she sent me this meme
Yes, you should run. It probably doesn’t do you any good to tell you this now, as I know how intoxicating those times can be, but you should run. I was in exactly this situation. Also it WILL be hard to find equivalent sex in the future. Just try not to think too much about the fact that you might have now peaked in that regard.
If you get to the point that you want some helpful answers, consider reading Attached by Amir Levine and Rachel Heller. I read it in one night, it was so helpful back in the day. See if maybe it touches any sensitive areas.
deleted by creator
Can’t it be kept in check with meds?
One explanation for someone who is bipolar. Hypomania can express as hypersexual.
My wife and past girlfriends have experienced this with me and to be honest it’s fun for the first hour but having a throbbing boner and inability to satisfy the urge stops being fun for both parties involved. Also makes woman feel horribly inadequate that they can’t get a man to cum. Add to it I try to do all sorts of uncomfortable things to us both to just find some release.
I’m sure that the bipolar woman go through what I have gone through it’s like eating nonstop and still being hungry even though your stomach is about to burst. You feel like a disgusting slob with every bite but can’t put the food down. All you crave is the sloppiest and nastiest food because anything healthy just doesn’t get you there. The regret afterwards sometimes is next level.
Not trying to be a downer, but you did ask.
There’s also the fun part of dialling in your medication to find the balance between being an overclocked sex machine and a walking wet noodle!
I’ve never heard a better explanation for this phenomena. Appreciate the insight.
Dang dude
Passion, like everything else, is cranked up to 11?
Pretty much. I had a partner with BPD for almost four years. It was extremely intense.
The sex was fantastic but fucking hell was it tough walking on eggshells constantly.
My brother is currently going through something similar with someone else with more severe BPD
Sensation seeking, emotional intensity, and a certain lack of inhibition.
The mania also helps. Bipolar isn’t just a happy-sad thing. The manic phase is categorized in the same group as schizoaffective disorders. Some of the most common symptoms of mania are hyper sexuality and feeling invincible. Imagine being absolutely insatiable even while doing it. So you keep going harder and harder, trying to find something to sate the urge. And the entire time, you’re delusional to the point of thinking nothing will hurt you. If you’re a manic girl who just brought home a random hookup, he’s about to get sex so hard his entire genetic line will be impressed.
Passion.
As a gay man, I had some of the best sex with a man that turned out to be a little cray cray. His place was immaculate but he freaked out on me after one hookup. Granted, I did cancel our second date, but no need to get weird about it. Blocked. Never driving around his place again either.
Yeah I dated a girl for 3 years that was amazing sex. Not worth the emotional abuse though.
Also I guess I shouldn’t have prefaced this with just women being like this. I’ve heard the same about men.
was she honest about her issues or did she manipulate you? was she working on it?
She was not honest and was not working on it. I was just hopeful it would magically get better. Because I’m stupid and figured it had to if I just kept working on it and being a good boyfriend. But I know now there wasn’t much I could do.
Less inhibitions.
From personsl experience: it’s not worth it.
Swap pronouns were applicable.
You’ll be so exhausted from her meltdowns, manipulation, and the constant repairs (literal and figurative) from her poor life choices that you won’t have the time or energy for sex. Then she’ll cheat on you with your gross scumbag neighbor who was old enough to be her father because she jumped to the conclusion that you did’t want her anymore and she wanted revenge.
She’ll then proceed to run off with one your friends. But not before explaining how it’s probably just temporary and the relationship will be stronger than ever when she comes back. So stay single. Oh, can you keep her cat for now? He doesn’t have room in his parent’s apartment that she’s moving into the day after fucking him for the first time.
My early 20s were trash. She ended up completing suicide a week before my wedding in 2012. Myself, I was so fucked up by that relationship I now live with chronic anhedonia and alexithymia. It literally broke my brain.
skill issue
This situation lead to me attempting suicide. I failed. Is that also a skill issue?
You still seem deeply traumatized. The way you speak about your experience is something that reminds me of myself and other people’s communication with unprocessed traumatic experiences.
You experience is valid, but the way you generalize and demonize BPD/mentally ill women is not. You can’t expect to get any pity or validation by randomly trauma dumping in a shitposting community. Getting angry and generalizing is often the first step towards healing, but… This is not the place to do it.
You’re accusing me of generalizing/demonizing women with BPD in a thread questioning if sex with mentally ill people is “worth it”. Get off your high horse and spare me your armchair psychoanalysis.
No I just don’t want to tell you straight up to just shut the fuck up. And I’m not accusing you, you obviously fucking did. You phrased it as if your experience is representative of all experiences, without any nuance, empathy, and expressed a deep grudge you still seem to hold. Nobody needs armchair psychoanalysis to tell you that that’s obviously something you still need to work on and not something to share as a reply to someone asking why BPD people bang better.
There’s plenty of ways to tell people “a relationship with a mentally ill person is a commitment and might backfire; be careful” - “she will fuck your neighbor and I almost killed myself” is arguably one of the shittier ones.