It’s from a Tim Robinson skit

https://youtu.be/B1pwyCl5ymE

What you said is still true, but this shit is funny and relevant so I thought you might enjoy it

When you think monster is about to grab your foot and drag you to hell, and your first thought is “great! Now I don’t have to go to work tomorrow.”

Mine keeps getting notices that she’s going to be served. Fun fact, the voicemails they leave me don’t say the name of the person they’re calling till the end.

Did you look him up to see what he did?

Fuck you Mariah Carey

Where I live, there are a lot of people who hold signs on the side of the road and the end of off ramps. I’m a funeral director, and I’ve had to cremate homeless people who got hit doing that. It makes me very anxious to see someone running across traffic to grab a dollar from someone three lanes over.

So that in particular bothers me pretty bad

It really should be:

Iowa

A place to stay