This is assuming that the thought is translated into something each person can understand.
“This is not you, this is god, you are the new messiah like my son Jesus before you. It is up to you to right all that’s gone wrong in my world. Many will come forward and say that they received this message but do not be fooled for that is Satan trying to defeat you.”
Then I get popcorn and watch the whole world burn.
“YOU ARE MY CHOSEN DISCIPLE. GO FORTH AND SLAY THE NON-BELIEVERS IN MY NAME.”
Don’t even say who you are. Everyone will just assume it’s the god they already believe in. And everyone who doesn’t believe in a god would start questioning everything.
“You’ve been right all along”
“Remember you’ll die.”
I’m not a troublemaker so it would have to be for a good reason… and how I wish I could shake people out of their stupor and there’s no better way than to consider your own mortality, as it puts things into perspective.
The government has been secretly tracking everyone’s farts since 1998. The next one you release will trigger your official ranking on the Global Flatulence Leaderboard. visible to everyone.
Half the world holds it in, the other half tries to fart so hard they shit themselves.
time for what if xkcd: “what if every human and animal on the planet farted at the same time?”
Why would the government keep that a secret?
SHOW ME WHAT YOU GOT!!
“go drain your bank account”
“Did you just switch it to broadcast? Fuck, turn it off!”
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