Have a little bird companion.

All gather and stand in awe at the majesty of the mustard tiddy!

Best. Day. Ever.

Paucity of waifu

I once saw a group of four or five seagulls gleefully dismember and eat a crab alive.

I’m not saying you shouldn’t, I’m just saying…that’s a possibility.

That’s my 20!

Little fuckass wingrat took my 20, took his picture with it and calls himself TeH mOneY PiDGiN and acts all benign and shit.

Fucker bought meth with it. Asshat.

I was in a low security federal prison for a couple years. There was actually a surprising amount of work and leisure activities to keep inmates occupied if they chose. There were maintenance jobs, including electrical and HVAC jobs that you could actually get certification for. There was a full library, education facility, computer lab, chapel, rec center with indoor and outdoor courts, and fully equipped music and art studios.

I worked in the education center, helping other inmates work towards their GED. Inmates who didn’t have a high school education were offered extra good time if they got their GED, and it was rewarding to be a part of. In the evening I usually went to rec and played in bands with other inmates who played.

The housing unit was usually quiet. We were all short timers who just wanted to get their time done and go home. We didn’t have cells. We were in little cubicles just big enough for a bunk, lockers, and a desk, and we generally had free roam around the place. Folks would get together and play board games in the evening. And of course there were your usual hustles…the store guys, guys who’d do your laundry, whatever.

Fart in comically obnoxious ways. Examples include the Doggy Leg Lift, the Goatse, the Modified Goatse, and one I simply call “The Hamburgler’s Revenge.”

So let me get this straight…

This guy set out to get revenge on a blackmailer, and Spidey took the blackmailer’s side???

Peter, we need to have a difficult conversation about your choices….