Dude have you seen the rainbow? ITS LITERALLY JUST VISIBLE LIGHT and its the greatest threat to the conservative world.

You way underestimate how much they care.

That feels about as appropriate as the Nazi flag

Yes, a distress flag

I know it when I see it

Yes I collect gay bath towels

Autism is caused by brain worms

Tell me you never had actual chickens

Malcom in the middle did it

You can call your cat anything you want, they still won’t come.

Owning real estate. Similar to being a “qualified investor” today

They dont- you can sign up for all evening classes if you want

Pool cleaners do

Just put the fucking paint on the wall and get paid.

Obviously not

Parasol

So this really is Obama’s fault?

Your first stop would be a bankruptcy lawyer.

Reading to a baby is about exposing them to different words and patterns than what you get from normal speech.

If you want my advice, talk to them constantly as if you are the narrator, and smile and make eye contact at every opportunity.

Not sure if this applies before birth. It couldnt hurt, so I suggest reading whatever you like to read. And make sure its something that the mother wants to hear, assuming you arent her.

Paint.