There’s a historical analog for antifreeze poisoning: poisoning from improperly brewed alcohol (methanol poisoning)

Thank you, the real joke is actually funny!

Just walk in with your resume and and ask to see the manager so you can shake their hand…

So less of a jam and more of a slam?

Blue collar generally refers to tradesmen, white collar is office work

Mamms effect was (unfortunately) never released

US and Germans (with some French celebrity prisoners) fight other Germans. My favorite part of this battle is when the French superstar Tennis player vaults a castle wall and runs through enemy lines to ask for reinforcements.

One time I couldn’t get a jar of jelly open so I smashed it. There are definitely better ways.

I’m a brass musician and an atheist so the only time I go to church is when I’m getting paid. The last time some Mormons approached me about going to church I asked them, “What’s the pay?”

They were genuinely confused.

That’s the game!

I like to play a little game when the bus shows up: 5 minutes early or 10 minutes late?

I’ve seen Jazz apples in stores around Southeastern Pennsylvania. They’re pretty good, but my favorite is Pazazz apples. They’re similar in size to Honeycrisp but sweeter with a bit of tartness to them.

One of my friends keeps chickens in a small coop surrounded by chicken wire. A while back some raccoons killed most of his chickens by pulling pieces of them through the small holes in the wire fence. A few years after the incident I was visiting my friend. While we were hanging out in the backyard I stepped on a dessicated chicken wing…

The thing that bothered me the most is how Aang sounds exactly like Dewey from Malcolm in the Middle

It’s what plants crave

What have you done to my boy Fido!?

It’s just Swamp German