“Inefficiency and bureaucracy are inherent in a centrally planned economy.”

I mean… I’m pretty sure inefficiency and bureaucracy are inherent in any system that includes human beings with free will, so…

Global Thermonuclear War exists in the form of DEFCON.

I don’t get it I don’t get it Idon’tgetit…

Avalanches, Since I Left You

If it turns into a shooting war between the US military and its own civilian populace, apart from the multitude of other unimaginable horrors, you would undoubtedly see countries trying to stoke the flames and make the conflict more involved and expensive for the United States. Hell, I’m pretty well convinced that it’s happening right now; if you were China or Russia or any other hostile foreign actor, you would much rather the United States destroy itself from within than try to confront us directly.

Routines is our friend. Routines takes care of us.

Map the tonal range of the human voice from 00000, the lowest-pitched, to 99999, the highest-pitched. Sing a note into your microphone that corresponds to your postal code.

EDIT: Make it a Base-36 range so as to allow letters A-Z when they are used in postal codes.

Can one trademark a brand and then announce that it is immediately public domain so that no one else can ever trademark it? Someone should trademark No Buy Stuff or some such phrase and do that.

Michael Burnham

Jayne Cobb

Willow Ulfgood

I’m not sure that doesn’t make prospect even more terrifying.

*crashes, car bursts into flames, driver climbs out of wreck and walks through fireball, is fine except that the waistband on his underwear melted to his skin, thereby prompting F1 to require special fireproof underwear for their drivers.

Perhaps you could get AMD to pay you $35 billion for the hypothetical potential of amusement later on.

Girl Scout Cookies

Those are awesome. It doesn’t quite reach those heights, but I was always fond of the opening theme from Ski or Die.

Why would I?

The Plants that Would Not Die

Watch the original Gone in 60 Seconds, from 1974. The car stunts are absolutely insane, to the extent that they probably shouldn’t have been allowed to make the movie the way they did, but it happened and I’m glad that cameras were rolling. The Nic Cage remake was trying to make a movie safer, slicker, and more coherently, but there’s no replacement for a bunch of insane stunt drivers risking their lives and the lives of everyone around them.