Yeah. Should be suits pulling them down. I really don’t like that this denigrates the wonderful people who actually do the work.

I can feel how strongly you feel about this, and I get it. A lot of people have been burned by workplaces where “teamwork” is just code for giving more while getting less. That kind of exploitation needs to be called out. People have every right to protect their time and energy in those environments. I support that fully.

But that’s not what happened here.

In this story, I wasn’t defending a corporation. I wasn’t demanding loyalty to a job. I was calling someone up to a standard I hold for myself and offer to my team, not out of obedience, but out of integrity. I’ve never talked down to this guy. I’ve treated him with patience, honesty, and consistency. I’ve modeled the values I believe in and asked him to rise, not for the company, but for his own sake. Because that’s what respect actually looks like in action.

You called me “the fucking problem,” accused me of guilt-tripping people, and painted me as some kind of corporate enforcer. That’s not just inaccurate. It’s unfair. And I’m going to push back on it.

Not out of ego. Not out of anger. But out of self-respect.

I believe we should challenge broken systems and still choose who we want to be in the middle of them. I believe in calling people higher, not because they owe it to a job, but because they owe it to themselves. And I believe that treating people with dignity, even when they lash out, is still worth doing.

So no, I’m not going to return the insult. But I am going to stand up for myself. Because this, right here, is what it looks like to respond with strength, not submission. With clarity, not cruelty.

You don’t have to agree with my take, but I hope this helps clarify it.

You’re 100% right that respect should be a two-way street. I said “should” be. It often is not. Especially when it comes to systems like fair compensation, time, and effort. No argument there. If a company or a boss is disrespecting your time and well-being, that needs to be addressed, period.

What I was trying to explore in my story is a different layer. Something personal and internal. Though respect should be a two way street, it is still a street worth walking alone. That even in imperfect systems, even when others don’t “earn” your respect or see your effort, there’s still a kind of power in choosing to show up with integrity. Not because they deserve it, but because you do.

Choosing to be reliable, communicative, and accountable, even when others aren’t, helps shape who you are. It builds character, trustworthiness, and personal dignity. It teaches you to lead yourself. That’s the kind of respect no one can take from you, even when the outer rewards aren’t there yet.

It’s not about obedience. It’s about owning your path.

It transforms your mind and, in turn, your life. It is a path worth walking.

Thanks again for engaging with the nuance. I really value conversations like this.

I hear you, and honestly? You’re not wrong. There are too many places where all the talk about “team” ends up being just a way to squeeze more out of people without giving anything back. That kind of exploitation deserves to be called out, and I’m with you there.

In our case, I do think our company tries to be generous in a lot of ways. But no, my team (and myself) don’t get paid more based on performance. So when I talk about respect, reliability, or rising to a challenge, I’m not saying the system rewards that. I’m saying you do.

What I wanted to share was really about a different kind of return on investment: the kind that lives inside you. Growth. Character. Reputation. Confidence. The way you carry yourself. The way people start to trust you without question. All of that sticks with you, no matter where you go or who signs your paycheck.

Being great doesn’t mean being a doormat or ignoring unfairness. It means choosing a higher standard for yourself, even when others haven’t earned it, but because you are worth that standard. This mindset has helped me build a career I’m proud of, even in imperfect systems.

Thanks for the push back. It helped me realize I needed to say this part more clearly.

I’ve spent the last year trying to make it work with one of my guys.

At first, I told him the rest of the team was having trouble connecting with him. He would wander off without telling anyone where he was going or what he was doing, which gave the impression that he wasn’t working. I explained that optics matter, because we’re all in this together. If we can’t count on each other, it makes it harder for everyone. He appreciated that conversation, but things didn’t improve.

He continued to show up late or call in sick, often on days when he knew we’d be busiest. I talked to him again about reliability—how it’s the most basic form of respect. Not just for your workplace, but for yourself. When you say you’re going to do something or be somewhere, it’s vital that your word means something. If you can’t be counted on, how can anyone rely on you?

I didn’t just tell him this. I lived it. I showed him with kindness and consistency how important those basic values are.

Last week was the busiest week our team has ever faced. It was also one of the most critical in terms of proving what we could do together. I prepped the team ahead of time and told them how proud I was to step up to the challenge with them.

On the first of the two most important days, he was late. The first 15 minutes were the most crucial of the entire day, and he missed half of them. I wasn’t angry. I handled it myself. But when he arrived, I told him how stressful that time was for me, and I reminded him again how important these two days were. He said he understood. He said he was sorry.

The next morning, I was 15 minutes into busting my ass alone. I texted him: Where are you? Nothing. Radio silence. No reply that day. Not a single call or message.

The next day, he told me he was sick and had a doctor’s note. The note was timestamped 3:45 p.m., and it said he was cleared to return to work that day.

I just stared at it for a moment. I didn’t get angry. I didn’t yell. I just said, “Okay,” and continued working. We worked in silence for most of the day.

Later, he said casually, “I heard you were upset yesterday morning.”

I replied calmly, “I was. Yes. It was stressful.”

He shrugged and said, “Sorry about that.”

I didn’t respond. I just kept working. Then, just before I left, I turned to him and said this in a calm but measured tone:

“Let me clarify something. Yesterday, I was upset because it was stressful. I’m not upset today. I’m disappointed today. I wanted to be able to say to the rest of the team that I could rely on you when it mattered most. But I can’t say that. I can’t defend you to the team when they feel like you leave them to figure it out on their own, because you left me when I told you I needed you the most. I’m not upset. I’m deeply disappointed.”

He tried to defend himself with the doctor’s note, but I raised my hand to stop him. He waited for me to say something else, but I didn’t. I let the silence speak, then walked out.

I’m sharing this because I saw this meme and it made me feel sad and reflect. I know it may be counter to the fun of the meme, but I thought the point was worth sharing.

Sometimes, jobs are crappy. Sometimes you work for people who don’t care but still expect you to. In those cases, I understand the temptation to stop caring or to burn bridges that don’t seem worth crossing.

But here’s my advice:

Respect—not because others have earned it, but because you are worth giving it to.

Hold yourself to a higher standard, not for them, but for you. Elevate yourself because it’s worth doing. Be better to yourself.

And when others who also respect themselves find you, they’ll recognize that quality in you. That’s when you find people worth teaming up with. That’s how you build something greater, something that’s not just productive, but meaningful and fun.

Fast food and major chains have gotten absurd. I used a gift card at Red Robin. It was $19 before tip for a dry burger and bland fries. Two bucks more could’ve gotten me a gourmet meal at a five-star place just down the street. The value just isn’t there anymore. Eating local almost always tastes better, feels better, and costs the same or less. Why settle for mediocrity when better is right around the corner?

As MartianSands pointed out, tolerance is not a philosophy; it is a social contract. When intolerance breaks that contract, the tolerant are under no obligation to tolerate it.

That realization was life-changing for me. It finally gave me the clarity to walk away from toxic relationships, knowing they were the ones holding back any real growth.

The only downside is that trying to explain this to someone intolerant just gets you labeled, quote, “a stupid science bitch who can’t make them smarter.”

I’m working on transitioning to using They/Them pronouns for everyone since they’re completely neutral and fit every context. If your preference is Xe/Xem, I respect that—but unfortunately, my brain just doesn’t have the bandwidth to keep track of multiple pronouns consistently. You get They/Them.

I am genuinely curious about your perspective—when you say the left can act in a fascist manner, could you provide some specific examples of what you mean? Also, how do you personally define fascism in this context?

The Greatest Showman is a masterclass in style over substance—a glittery spectacle that sacrifices depth and integrity for catchy tunes and flashy visuals. Beneath its feel-good facade lies a shallow, formulaic narrative that romanticizes P.T. Barnum’s exploitative history while failing to give meaningful voices to the marginalized characters it claims to celebrate.

The musical numbers, though undeniably infectious, feel jarringly modern and out of place, prioritizing audience pandering over authenticity. Despite its popularity, the film’s sanitized themes and lack of emotional nuance reveal it as more empty circus than cinematic triumph.

If you’re looking for substance, you’ll find the tent empty.

You. I like you.

I wish everyone could see and understand what I believe. I think it would make it so much easier to talk to people.

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Whenever I run into a spider web, I like to immediately imagine that I just won a race I didn’t know I was in. It makes me smile and feel less like I want to jump into a fire.

I did not expect to watch that whole thing but I’m really glad I did. Even teared up there at the end. Thanks for sharing.

Go watch her breakdown of The Church Play Cinematic Universe and you will understand.

Chairs are one of those things that you need to drop serious money on if you sit more than a few hours a day. Focus on chairs for office work and expect to pay over $1k.

What? Are you talking about a potato ricer?